The Date Weight Trap

I assumed the concept of 'Date Weight' was common knowledge, but have been getting some puzzled looks when I explain my observations of this phenomenon.  Basically, I have noticed that many people (particularly females) seem to have two different weights that they maintain based on their single status.  Single females tend to be 20 to 30 pounds lighter than females who are in a serious relationship or married.  What's the deal?

Ok, this isn't that hard to figure out, and actually one of the more positive aspects of being single... singles interested in attracting an intimate partner seem to have increased motivation to display a more healthy physical appearance. Makes sense.  If your house is for sale, you will want to put a fresh coat of paint on it so that it is more appealing to potential buyers.

One of the first thoughts that cross my mind when I see that someone has lost a lot of weight is to wonder if they have recently gone through some sort of break up that has made them suddenly available for dating. It isn't easy to maintain a healthy body weight these days, and often what is lacking in those that struggle is the motivation to exercise and eat sensibly.  Well, it can be very motivating when you are trying to 'compete' with other singles, to be as healthy looking as possible.

Why is it more attractive to be at a healthy body weight?  Humans are instinctively attracted to a mate who appears to possess longevity and the ability to support a family structure.  Being obese reduces life expectancy due to increased risk  of certain diseases including  heart disease, diabetes, and cancer. Therefore, it is perfectly natural to feel a certain sort of attraction to a partner that will potentially be physically capable of raising children for the longer term.  The converse holds true as well.  People who are too thin project an unhealthy vibe and can also be percieved as unattractive.

So, the date weight trap then, is to reduce your body weight to its most attractive state, only to 'let yourself go' once you have established the monogamous relationship.  The other partner consequently, has sort of been mislead.

I really don't think this is a 'trap' however.  Once you have committed to a partner, it really won't matter how much they weigh, inate pair-bonding emotions will take over, and love hormones will allow you to accept your partner regardless of their physical disposition.  The key, though, is to get your foot in the door.

And, I will fully support anything that helps motivate people to get in better shape, as 67% of the American population is currently overweight and/or obese.   Unfortunately, the initial stages of attraction are based on physical first impressions.  Internet dating combats this slightly, allowing people to get to know each other before meeting physically, however, for the most part, you still need to present your best so you can attract a compatible mate. 

I can't think of any real downside to making it a goal to be at 'date weight' if you are single person in Muscatine hoping to attract an intimate partner.  I am not suggesting that singles obsess about their weight, however.  Your outer shell won't ultimately be what attracts your soul mate...given the proper amount of time, patience and a bit of luck you will find true love by simply 'being yourself'... I am merely suggesting that establishing your date weight may quicken the process.